Getting In Bed with KATI MORTON

LIVE IT UP

Christina Grimmie, a musician/YouTuber, was killed last night by a sick individual for no reason. I keep thinking about how (obviously) she had no idea that yesterday was her last day to live, and just how heavy that feels.

She was so young, and I can't imagine all the things she will never get to do because her life ended so abruptly. I don't mean for this to be a depressing post (lol...I know, right?), just a thought-provoking one.

RIP Christina.


Life is just too short. LIVE.IT.UP.

Hopeless is Nothing

Negativity's a bitch, isn't it? Have you ever talked to someone who wanted help or advice but then they shoot down every single idea and thought you have? I mean, you name it and they've already tried it. They have a million and one reasons as to why it didn't work and a million and three reasons as to why it won't work if they were to try it again. It's the worst, right? *nods*

This might seem harsh, but sometimes people need to hear a bit of straightforward truth in order to get where they need to be. Sometimes people just aren't able to hear the more subtle hints that we are far more likely to offer.

Here's the thing. If you sit there and shoot down every single suggestion someone offers you, then, SPOILER ALERT, you don't actually want advice. You may say you do and you may honestly even believe that you do, but you don't. If you are not willing to accept the help and advice that is available to you, then you aren't ready to change your situation and or attitude.

Now, I understand that sometimes people just need to vent about their stresses, and that's totally fine, but there comes a time when you have to ask yourself if you're really doing yourself (or anyone) any good.
And, I would bet more often than not, that when you do this, it's probably at night, when you're worn out, or when you're not feeling well. My mom has always said that everything seems and feels so much worse when you're sick or tired, and SHE'S RIGHT. For example, if the thing you are talking about is out of your control and continuing to discuss it is not going to change anything...then you are wasting your time and energy. Not to mention possibly just making yourself feel worse.
I mean, why would you want to talk in circles about something that is just going to perpetuate a miserable cycle of negativity?!

There is no magical answer to your problems. It'd be fabulous if shit worked like that, but it doesn't, so we have to find (preferably healthy) ways to deal.

Also, if you aren't ready and willing to listen to and apply someone's advice to your life...then STOP ASKING FOR IT. That may sound harsh, but it's how a lot of people feel. It can be pretty disheartening to offer up your best advice only to be shot down by the person you just spent time listening to and caring about.

Nothing is hopeless. And don't say that your case is, because it's not. You just have to keep hope that things can get better. If you refuse to believe that things will get better then there isn't much room for things to improve, because all the space is filled with negativity and doubt. So, don't give up on the hope that things can improve, because if you do...it will become a self-fulfilling prophecy.

I'm not sure if I've said everything I wanted to in this post or not...I started writing this almost three months ago and am just now getting back to it. But, either way, I hope you have found something in this post helpful or thought-provoking.

Until Next Time,
Carly (but really Batman)

My Meditation Playlist

Pure Obsessional OCD (Pure O) - Kati Morton on mental illness

How to NOT Be a Jerk on the Internet

Such an amazing video from such an amazing person. Please watch and share!

The Time I Added Music

4 TIPS: When to reach out for Professional mental health help?

I love this video!

Awkward Thug Does Walmart

Clumsy Girl Needs a Helmet

Listening to the Wind: Batman(NOS) Returns, vol. 2

BATMAN(NOS) RETURNS!

Screw You, Game of Thrones!

Do you ever feel lost? I mean, completely and utterly, I-haven't-got-a-clue-as-to-what-I'm-actually-supposed-to-be-doing-with-my-life lost? Really?! Okay, good! Phew! I'm glad I'm not alone in that. Unless, of course, you answered "No, Carly. I have absolutely no idea what you're talking about."....then I just don't know what to do with you.

Anyway, if you are in the aforementioned boat... Welcome! Please keep all arms and legs inside the vessel at all times unless otherwise instructed. You can (and should) expect ridiculous delays and randomly placed obstacles that include (but are not limited to) hoops of fire that you will be expected to jump through. And, yes, these hoops will appear even when you feel like you can't hold up your head.

*sigh* ...Ever feel like that? I do. It really sucks, doesn't it? And it's currently winter. I hate winter. It's so gloomy and depressing. And, when you actually struggle with depression, the cold weather and lack of sun just makes it that much more depressing.
I mean, WILL IT EVER END? Where's that damn groundhog when you need him?! Or his shadow. Wait, unless the shadow's bad... Is the shadow bad? Whichever means "Spring is coming!" is what I need.
Screw you, Game of Thrones! Winter isn't coming, it's already here and it sucks! WHEN IS SPRING?! (Spoiler alert: I actually do know the answer to that question.)



UPDATE: I believe I wrote everything above during the 2014-2015 winter and never published it. I guess I didn't think it was finished and didn't know where to go from there. Honestly, I can't believe I had enough creativity in me during a winter depression to even write that much! I must have been having a slightly "up" kind of day.

Boy, do I have enough creativity now though! *dances* Luckily, I'm currently in an Up Swing. *cue excessive applause*
I'm in so much of an Up Swing that I've actually already written and published another post today... *record scratches/music stops* *GASPS* *everyone freezes* I know. I know. It was just hours ago! Including this post, I've already written three whole blog entries this year...aaand last year, I had a whopping total of *wait for it* TWO entries. Look at me go! *victory dance*

On a similar note, I'm beginning to think I could live my life speaking in asterisks. *ponders*

Also, Jean-Ralphio Saperstein has turned out to be a big influence in my life the last few days and I find this to be highly unexpected, mildly funny, and moderately disturbing. *turns on Chris Traeger voice* I've literally been singing my sentences. And, as I silently read the words that I've just written, I find myself "hearing" them in Ron Swanson's voice. WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?

Okay, well...on that note, I think I'll be going.

Until next time! *tips hat*
Carly (But really Batman)


P.S. NO SPOILERS FOR GAME OF THRONES OR ANY SHOW EVER, PLEASE AND THANK YOU.

P.P.S. After giving it some thought, I might publish this entry tomorrow since I already posted one today... But, for the record, I totally wrote this yesterday. However, if this ends up appearing on my blog under March 13, 2016...then I wrote this today.

♫ It's Just Another Manic Sunday ♫

Note to self: learn more alt codes CUZ DAT SHIT IS FUN

Ello, Internet! How YOU doin'? ;) (If you don't get that reference, we probably can't be FRIENDS.)

DISCLAIMER: I am fully aware that the actual lyrics to the song I referenced in this title are "it's just another manic Monday." However, today is Sunday, and the next line in the song is "I wish it was Sunday, 'cause that's my funday," sooo IT'S ALL GOOD, YO.

Also, just out of curiosity, whose funday is Sunday??? I mean, I realize that Sunday isn't Monday, which is nice, but I just have a difficult time believing that Sunday is as much of a funday as, oh, say...Saturday? *shrug* Whatever you say, ladies! And, by "ladies" I mean "The Bangles."

Okay, so, last weekend I went out of town to visit some people and do some bridesmaid attire shopping for a friend's wedding that is happening later this year. As a combination of my odd sleep schedule and anxiety, I got about literally ONE hour of shitty, barely-dozing sleep on Friday night. After, somehow, surviving the day without collapsing, crying, OR being excessively grouchy, I managed to sleep a whole FOUR hours Saturday night (technically, Sunday morning), before another full day of Doing Things. On Sunday night, I kept waking up but managed to sleep, off and on, for about 11 hours. Not exactly the most restful sleep, but it was better than the combined FIVE hours I had gotten the previous two nights.
On Monday, I laid down most of the day due to feeling like shit and also feeling rather depressed. On Tuesday, however, something happened; I started to feel different. Not just less shitty, physically...but mentally, as well. I still felt depressed, but it wasn't as much, and I was beginning to feel energized. I would say it was a back-and-forth kind of thing, but it was also a pretty at-the-same-time sort of thing, if that makes sense.
So, on Wednesday, it was more of the same (well, similar, at least), but I could tell I was feeling even more energized and even less depressed.
By the time Thursday came around, I felt like a million bucks and was tweeting things like, "TYPING IN LOWER CASE JUST DOESN'T SEEM ACCURATE RIGHT NOW BUT I'M NOT EVEN YELLING #HYPER"  and "Google just told me I'm the life of the party. #HYPER" with a rather upbeat and dance-y GIF from Pitch Perfect 2.

Now, I'm no mental health professional, but I'd venture to say that "#hyper" *might* be code for "#hypomanic."
And, apparently, I'm not the only one with that suspicion. For example, after talking with a few friends within the last few days, they were collectively like, "OH, HEY, IS YOUR DEPRESSION LIFTING? YAAAY!" and after a few more minutes they were like, "OH, HODE (HOLD) UP. ARE YOU MAYBE TOO UP?" and I was like, "PROBABLY. PROBABLY, I AM."
Lol... I may or may not have hooded-up those interactions, by the way...
But, I mean, "too up" is a relative term, yes? Or, maybe it's an objective term? Whatever the word is that means the definition can vary... #dyslexia

ANYWAY, I feel WONDERFUL and I'm stoked to finally not feel like winter froze over (Dear Carly, wtf are you even saying?). As of lately, I feel far more upbeat and dance-y and productive and talkative and I'm *finally* writing again (HOLLLLAAAA). Who knows, shit might get real crazy up in hurr, and I may or may not even start VLOGGING again! *GASP*

I'm not even sure what the point of this post is, other than maybe to attempt to express my hyperactivity in a semi creative fashion? Is blogging even considered creative these days? PROBABLY NOT since Snapchat is a thing. For the record, Snapchat is confusing AF, but that is another story for another time. I'm heynewshoes on Snapchat, by the way...and I've NEVER.POSTED.A.THING. *bows*

So, in conclusion, I may or may not be too up at the moment. I suppose time will tell. Or, maybe the fact that I'm turning into Jean-Ralphio from Parks and Rec and ♫ singing my seeentenceeees ♫ will tell. You decide. Or maybe I decide. WHATEVS. *shrug*

Well, that's not really all I've got for now, but if I don't stop myself here, this will be the post that never ends. So, I will catch you on the flip side!

Until Next Time... Peace out, yo,
Carly (But really Batman)


P.S. Despite the title of this post, I am currently listening to this song on repeat and it's 100% Hannah Hart's fault. So, from the bottom of my gay little heart...thank you, Hannah. :D *dances*

People are Crazy

People are crazy. Really, they are. And, a lot of the time, it has nothing to do with mental health diagnoses. Fo realz tho, I ain't got time for these crazies.

I'm incredibly sick of dealing with so much negativity in my life. But, what do you do when a lot of the negativity involves your family and you can't exactly escape it? Nor do you want to. Well, let me clarify...I want to get away from the negativity, for sure...I just don't exactly want to stop talking to these people, you know? And, it's not that simple anyway! UGH, can you say "rock and a hard place?!" Also, how did that phrase come to be? I mean, who literally got stuck between a rock and another hard place and decided to make that a thing people say? *googles*

Update: Okay, so, I just googled it, and, apparently, the phrase seems to have originated in the western United States (Arizona and California) in the 1920s and '30s. It had something to do with a financial crisis and or mining back in the day. #HistoryLesson #idioms

Do you like my use of hashtags there? Me either.

Oh, man...I haven't blogged in almost a year. Actually, I'm one week shy of going a year without blogging. So, excuse me if I'm a bit rusty. I feel like this is more of a journal entry than a blog post...but, I mean, what is a blog post if not a journal or sorts?

By the way, did you know that the word "blog" is short for "web-log?" Because it totally is. LOOK IT UP.

Okay, well...that's all I got for now.

Oh, wait! One more thing. I totally recently wrote a foreword for Kati Morton's new LGBTQ Workbook (check it out on iBooks and KatiMorton.com! It's FREE!). So, that's pretty exciting! I actually used the phrase, "From the bottom of my gay little heart" sooo if that sounds interesting to you, feel free to read it. Also, even if it doesn't sound interesting, just skip my foreword and read the workbook part. Kati worked really hard on it and it's wonderful.

Okay, well...that's really all I got for now.

Catch you on the flip side!

Until Next Time,
Carly (but really Batman)