Hopeless is Nothing

Negativity's a bitch, isn't it? Have you ever talked to someone who wanted help or advice but then they shoot down every single idea and thought you have? I mean, you name it and they've already tried it. They have a million and one reasons as to why it didn't work and a million and three reasons as to why it won't work if they were to try it again. It's the worst, right? *nods*

This might seem harsh, but sometimes people need to hear a bit of straightforward truth in order to get where they need to be. Sometimes people just aren't able to hear the more subtle hints that we are far more likely to offer.

Here's the thing. If you sit there and shoot down every single suggestion someone offers you, then, SPOILER ALERT, you don't actually want advice. You may say you do and you may honestly even believe that you do, but you don't. If you are not willing to accept the help and advice that is available to you, then you aren't ready to change your situation and or attitude.

Now, I understand that sometimes people just need to vent about their stresses, and that's totally fine, but there comes a time when you have to ask yourself if you're really doing yourself (or anyone) any good.
And, I would bet more often than not, that when you do this, it's probably at night, when you're worn out, or when you're not feeling well. My mom has always said that everything seems and feels so much worse when you're sick or tired, and SHE'S RIGHT. For example, if the thing you are talking about is out of your control and continuing to discuss it is not going to change anything...then you are wasting your time and energy. Not to mention possibly just making yourself feel worse.
I mean, why would you want to talk in circles about something that is just going to perpetuate a miserable cycle of negativity?!

There is no magical answer to your problems. It'd be fabulous if shit worked like that, but it doesn't, so we have to find (preferably healthy) ways to deal.

Also, if you aren't ready and willing to listen to and apply someone's advice to your life...then STOP ASKING FOR IT. That may sound harsh, but it's how a lot of people feel. It can be pretty disheartening to offer up your best advice only to be shot down by the person you just spent time listening to and caring about.

Nothing is hopeless. And don't say that your case is, because it's not. You just have to keep hope that things can get better. If you refuse to believe that things will get better then there isn't much room for things to improve, because all the space is filled with negativity and doubt. So, don't give up on the hope that things can improve, because if you do...it will become a self-fulfilling prophecy.

I'm not sure if I've said everything I wanted to in this post or not...I started writing this almost three months ago and am just now getting back to it. But, either way, I hope you have found something in this post helpful or thought-provoking.

Until Next Time,
Carly (but really Batman)

Awkward Thug Does Walmart

Clumsy Girl Needs a Helmet

Listening to the Wind: Batman(NOS) Returns, vol. 2

♫ It's Just Another Manic Sunday ♫

Note to self: learn more alt codes CUZ DAT SHIT IS FUN

Ello, Internet! How YOU doin'? ;) (If you don't get that reference, we probably can't be FRIENDS.)

DISCLAIMER: I am fully aware that the actual lyrics to the song I referenced in this title are "it's just another manic Monday." However, today is Sunday, and the next line in the song is "I wish it was Sunday, 'cause that's my funday," sooo IT'S ALL GOOD, YO.

Also, just out of curiosity, whose funday is Sunday??? I mean, I realize that Sunday isn't Monday, which is nice, but I just have a difficult time believing that Sunday is as much of a funday as, oh, say...Saturday? *shrug* Whatever you say, ladies! And, by "ladies" I mean "The Bangles."

Okay, so, last weekend I went out of town to visit some people and do some bridesmaid attire shopping for a friend's wedding that is happening later this year. As a combination of my odd sleep schedule and anxiety, I got about literally ONE hour of shitty, barely-dozing sleep on Friday night. After, somehow, surviving the day without collapsing, crying, OR being excessively grouchy, I managed to sleep a whole FOUR hours Saturday night (technically, Sunday morning), before another full day of Doing Things. On Sunday night, I kept waking up but managed to sleep, off and on, for about 11 hours. Not exactly the most restful sleep, but it was better than the combined FIVE hours I had gotten the previous two nights.
On Monday, I laid down most of the day due to feeling like shit and also feeling rather depressed. On Tuesday, however, something happened; I started to feel different. Not just less shitty, physically...but mentally, as well. I still felt depressed, but it wasn't as much, and I was beginning to feel energized. I would say it was a back-and-forth kind of thing, but it was also a pretty at-the-same-time sort of thing, if that makes sense.
So, on Wednesday, it was more of the same (well, similar, at least), but I could tell I was feeling even more energized and even less depressed.
By the time Thursday came around, I felt like a million bucks and was tweeting things like, "TYPING IN LOWER CASE JUST DOESN'T SEEM ACCURATE RIGHT NOW BUT I'M NOT EVEN YELLING #HYPER"  and "Google just told me I'm the life of the party. #HYPER" with a rather upbeat and dance-y GIF from Pitch Perfect 2.

Now, I'm no mental health professional, but I'd venture to say that "#hyper" *might* be code for "#hypomanic."
And, apparently, I'm not the only one with that suspicion. For example, after talking with a few friends within the last few days, they were collectively like, "OH, HEY, IS YOUR DEPRESSION LIFTING? YAAAY!" and after a few more minutes they were like, "OH, HODE (HOLD) UP. ARE YOU MAYBE TOO UP?" and I was like, "PROBABLY. PROBABLY, I AM."
Lol... I may or may not have hooded-up those interactions, by the way...
But, I mean, "too up" is a relative term, yes? Or, maybe it's an objective term? Whatever the word is that means the definition can vary... #dyslexia

ANYWAY, I feel WONDERFUL and I'm stoked to finally not feel like winter froze over (Dear Carly, wtf are you even saying?). As of lately, I feel far more upbeat and dance-y and productive and talkative and I'm *finally* writing again (HOLLLLAAAA). Who knows, shit might get real crazy up in hurr, and I may or may not even start VLOGGING again! *GASP*

I'm not even sure what the point of this post is, other than maybe to attempt to express my hyperactivity in a semi creative fashion? Is blogging even considered creative these days? PROBABLY NOT since Snapchat is a thing. For the record, Snapchat is confusing AF, but that is another story for another time. I'm heynewshoes on Snapchat, by the way...and I've NEVER.POSTED.A.THING. *bows*

So, in conclusion, I may or may not be too up at the moment. I suppose time will tell. Or, maybe the fact that I'm turning into Jean-Ralphio from Parks and Rec and ♫ singing my seeentenceeees ♫ will tell. You decide. Or maybe I decide. WHATEVS. *shrug*

Well, that's not really all I've got for now, but if I don't stop myself here, this will be the post that never ends. So, I will catch you on the flip side!

Until Next Time... Peace out, yo,
Carly (But really Batman)


P.S. Despite the title of this post, I am currently listening to this song on repeat and it's 100% Hannah Hart's fault. So, from the bottom of my gay little heart...thank you, Hannah. :D *dances*

How to Deal With the Anxiety Monster

   Your palms get clammy. Your muscles tense up. Your heart begins to beat faster and faster, working up to a racing pace. It's that physical, panic-all-over feeling that you hate. If you know what the hell I'm talking about, you have most likely experienced the phenomenon known as "Anxiety." You have my sincerest condolences. 

   Anxiety really sucks, doesn't it? It's like, THE most useless and inconvenient thing. Not actually, of course, but it sure as hell can seem like it. And the anxiety trigger could be anything from going to the store to taking a test to meeting new people to stepping out your front door. Or simply thinking about doing these things. It doesn't feel fair that people should have to experience such discomfort over seemingly simple events. And, you know what? It's not fair. I can't currently think of anything about mental health issues that IS fair... And, it's not like pointing out unfairness is going to solve any problems, per se, but sometimes it can help on some level to know that someone else recognizes the injustice. And, let me tell you, I recognize it.

   So, it was brought to my attention that A LOT of people struggle with (seemingly) simple things, such as going to the store for basic necessities. And, when I think about it, that's just ridiculous. I do NOT mean that we are ridiculous for being anxious about these things, but it is totally and completely ridiculous that we have to deal with the Anxiety Monster in the first place. 

   I'm writing all of this because I recently received a blog/vlog topic suggestion from someone on the website, asking for ideas on how to "keep your cool," so to speak, in public places. I thought this was a pretty great suggestion, so I thought I'd try to offer up my oh-so unprofessional advice to anyone who is interested. 


   First of all, it seems like most of the time the worst part of the anxiety comes before I'm actually doing the thing that makes me anxious. For example, I will get super crazy anxious when I'm at home, before I go to the library, but if I can just make myself leave the house...the library (the thing that was making me so anxious) usually isn't NEARLY as bad as the Anxiety Monster was convincing me it would be. Sometimes just getting yourself up and out is the most challenging part, and the phrase "twenty seconds of insane courage" is what I use to help get myself in motion. 

   I started using this after watching We Bought a Zoo. It's a cute family movie in which Matt Damon's character tells his son that twenty seconds of courage is all it takes to do something great. He promises that just twenty seconds of (potentially) embarrassing bravery will result in something that was worth the act of courage. It may sound cheesy, but it freaking works. Try it. After all, what do you have to lose? 

As far as staying calm once you are in the situation that makes you anxious, here are some ideas:

• Slow, deep breaths. In through your nose, out through your mouth. [Some of you have told me that this makes you focus too much on your breathing and then you panic. If that is the case, obviously this probably wouldn't be your best option.] Kati Morton actually has an awesome video on how to do a relaxation breathing exercise that I recommend all the time. 
• Positive distractions. This can be something like listening to music while you walk through the store, library, etc. or you can bring a stress ball or worry stone...just something to fidget with. You can even ask a trusted friend to go with you, or you could call that person while at the store. You can also count sheep (or dinosaurs) in your head or try mental math. 
• Talk yourself through it. Just tell yourself what is *actually* going on. "Okay, I'm going to a store. I need to pick up a few things. This makes me so anxious and that sucks but it won't kill me. Chances are, it won't even be that bad. Chances are, I will be glad that I went." Stuff like that. Try to be mindful of the situation and you might be surprised by the results.
• Don't fight it. You heard me. Don't fight the fact that you are anxious. Accept it and try to do what you need/want to do anyway. I find that my anxiety gets way worse if I try to control it. However, if I talk myself through the anxiety and what I'm feeling, it gives me something to focus my energy on instead of freaking out about being anxious. 

   I hope this oh-so unprofessional advice is of some help to someone out there. If you have anything you'd like to see me blog (or vlog) about, please feel free to let me know. I'd love to hear your thoughts!


Until Next Time, 
Carly (But really Batman)